The way you ask for a divorce is more important than you think

Knowing that you want to ask for a divorce and actually doing so are two entirely different things. Even if you realize this is a conversation you need to have, taking the first step is not always easy.

The way you ask for divorce is extremely important, as taking the right approach will put you in better position to succeed as the process unfolds. Conversely, if you and your spouse partake in a blowout fight when first discussing your divorce, things can get messy soon enough.

Here are a few tips you can follow when asking for a divorce:

  • Prepare yourself: It's essential to know what you want to say, how you want to say it and the way you'll react to everything that comes your way. You can't prepare for everything, but you can try your best to do so.
  • Choose the right time and place: When and where you ask for a divorce is just as important as what you say. If you block off time and choose a private setting, you're more likely to get more out of the conversation. However, if you ask for a divorce in a public setting, all while acting like you don't care, it will only complicate your situation.
  • Be respectful and firm: Even if you're not getting along with your spouse, you shouldn't disrespect him or her when asking for a divorce. Just the same, remain firm in your intentions, as your spouse may ask you to reconsider or provide reasons why you shouldn't proceed.
  • Don't engage in an argument: Maybe your spouse will take this conversation in stride, as they realize that divorce really is best for the both of you. Or maybe they'll become upset and angry. If this happens, you should firmly tell him or her that you don't want to argue and will walk away from the conversation if it continues.
  • Don't talk details: You've probably been thinking about things like property division, child custody, child support and alimony. Even though these details are important, they're best left for the divorce process. For example, you can discuss all of these things during mediation.

There is no easy way to ask for a divorce, so you should simply do your best and hope that things go as planned. Once you have your intentions in the open, you can learn more about your legal rights and how the divorce process will unfold.

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