Mediation can save your sanity in a divorce

Solana Beach residents who are getting divorced need to be strategic about their decisions. But, since the divorce process is fraught with emotions, this can be difficult.

One way that divorcing couples can remove themselves from the fray of emotional outbursts is to agree to mediate their divorce.

Why mediate?

There are numerous reasons that couples choose mediation over litigation. One can adjust the imbalance of power present in so many marriages. This is especially helpful when one spouse is the breadwinner and the other spouse remains at home and cares for the children and the home.

Even when both spouses earn roughly the same amounts, it doesn't mean that it is a marriage of equals. One partner may have ceded their power to the other for any number of reasons — cultural norms, acquiescence to their partner's wishes or because of their own insecurities.

Preserve your power with mediation

Choosing alternate dispute resolution can preserve (or restore) both spouses' inherent power. Through mediation, splitting spouses can improve their communication skills and learn to identify and state their needs while sidestepping conflict.

To be sure, mediation isn't intended for all couples. If there have been incidents of domestic violence in the relationship, litigation is the preferred process for ending a marriage. There must also be civility between the parties to effect a good resolution through mediation.

Effective mediators employ various methods to enable divorcing couples to communicate constructively. For instance, mediators don't permit the parties to talk over one another and interrupt.

Will alternative dispute resolution work for you?

Many couples are able to resolve their issues using mediation. Even when all matters can't be concluded through mediation sessions, mediation can still be quite useful. Every matter resolved in this way is one fewer matter that needs to be litigated by a judge in the California family law courts.

That's the primary way in which mediating your divorce can save both spouses money. In most cases, it is also a more expedient way to resolve your marital disputes. Only you and your spouse can determine whether mediation is best for your situation, but learning all you can about the process can pave the way for success.

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